Oof. That hurt. I don’t know of anyone who was expecting that kind of pain from the last match. Somehow, the chickens missed it. Perhaps their powers were clouded by the residual love for Adrian and the Aztex. Perhaps it was their new ethically sourced, pelleted feed that threw them off. Regardless, they laid the…
MLS teams have between 6-9 (nice!) games left to play in the 2022 regular season, meaning it’s officially crunch time for everyone trying to make the playoffs. In the East, 5th through 9th place is separated by just 2 points, while the West logjam sees 6th through 10th place with only a 3-point difference. With…
Well, Austin FC picked up its first road loss in nearly three months on Saturday night in Minnesota. If you had told us at the beginning of the season that a road run to Montreal, Charlotte, Colorado, Atlanta, Frisco, and Kansas City would have led to 16 points in 18, we would have all thought…
I’m not going to lie to you, my dear and gentle readers. My hens were off in their prediction. They saw the win but they didn’t foresee the assault on our collective blood pressure. I began to despair. My pride in the powers of my hens and my ability to read them had taken a…
We are less than two months from the playoffs starting, which is weird to think about because this season has flown by. Luckily for us, this is MLS and the unique setup of the league typically offers up an insane stretch run where a bunch of teams are in a Ron Burgundy news team fight. …
Well DC United tried their hardest to stay competitive with LAFC on Tuesday night, it simply wasn’t enough for Wayne Rooney’s men, especially once they were down to 10 men. At this point, LAFC is 9 points above us, and they only need 19 more points to eliminate us and clinch home field advantage. Even…
As many of you are aware, The False Nine periodically has mailbags where we solicit questions via our Twitter fan base and answer them. This particular question deserves more than just a response as part of an article, it deserves an entire article due to not only its genius, but also that it resulted in…
It’s a midweek cheering guide. You know what that means? Quick hits! Remember, we aren’t picking winners here. We’re trying to figure out who to root for so that it helps Austin FC (or, ya know, makes us laugh). All ratings are on a scale of 1-5, with 5 being the most impactful towards ATXFC….
Well, the Verde and Black somehow pulled out a win on Saturday night with the second best comeback of the season, and officially eliminated Sporting Kansas City from finishing above Austin FC. We have avoided ending up with the Anthony J. Precourt Memorial Wooden Spoon (yes, that’s its real name) for another season! I still…
If you are unfamiliar with the concept of The False 9’s La Murga Report, click here. Friends, we think it’s late enough in the season that you should know exactly how the Murga Report sausage is made, so to speak. The most important thing to note is that The False 9 is not part of the…