This past weekend there was a giveaway at the Austin FC vs. Orlando City SC match, so you know we had to grab one and do the ranking. For those unfamiliar with the concept, Past rankings can be found here. It’s a very simple system for very simple items, everything is graded 1-100 with 5…
Author: Charles Peacock
Austin FC supporter since day 1, find me in Section 104
The Chickens Rule the Roost
It’s been a rough few days. The chickens have been misbehaving. Had I known how difficult it would be I would have said no (or killed them for smoking purposes right after Louis left). Friday morning I got out of bed and immediately heard a crunch sound, an egg had been laid next to my…
A New Chicken Caretaker in Town
I’ve been a skeptic about our chickens ever since the idea was first introduced by Louis de Ludovico and my skepticism turned to hatred when they initially attacked me. Since then the chickens and I have gone through a glastnost into an uneasy detente I felt like I would have been the 6th or at…
Josh Wolff’s Potential Burner Accounts – a False Nine Investigation
I’m sitting in a rocking chair on a porch in the outskirts of the Austin area. The air is warm, a cooling breeze pleasantly wafting through as I rock gently back and forth in a wooden rocking chair. The slight creak of the wooden deck, a reminder of my movement, keeps a steady rhythm. I…
The False Nine Mailbag
It’s been a trying time in Austin FC fandom, and not just because of the results on the pitch, so we thought it would be a good time to open up the mailbag and listen to our readers. Who else would be keeping track of Wolff’s shirt color? The Striker? Moontower? We Are Austin TV?…
Parsing through some Nits in Houston
A great many things have been written about Texas’ MLS teams, and this is certainly one of them. If you’re looking for false equivalencies, a writer unable to stick to an opinion, and weird cultural stereotypes, then this is the piece for you Well, this rivalry got heated quick. I mean, I understand it. I…
The False Nine Mailbag 4/18/2022
Hello everyone and welcome to the inaugural False Nine Mailbag. This is something we will do from time to time when we need content and try to take the pulse of Austin FC fandom in a way that only we could. As always, these are the most prescient questions regarding Austin FC and it’s fan…
The Quest – A Q2 Adventure Story
This quest began simply enough, on February 25, 2022, Austin FC President Andy Loughnane said in an Interview with the Austin American Statesman that “We do have $6.50 beer and $7.50 beer available at multiple points.” I, an attendee of dozens of matches at Q2 had never seen beers at these prices, accustomed to seeing…
The Definitive Austin FC Giveaway Index
We here at The False Nine, in our attempt to cover all aspects of Austin FC fandom, have come up with a grading rubric to judge and rate giveaways at Q2 stadium.