Gentle reader, I believe Cicero wrote it best: “O tempora! O mores!” O, the times! O, the customs! Our beloved El FC has been, to be charitable, not reaching its potential. When passers-by see me and my hens as we stroll along one of our fair city’s avenues, I am often asked how I feel…
Author: Louis de Ludovico
Chicken Prediction: Revolution Ahoy!
Gentle reader, Wednesday was a game. It was a game to remember. It was a game to forget. It was Dickensian to its core: good guys, bad guys, evil goings on, everything. It’s nothing to be proud of, but my hens nailed the score. Our dear friend, Phil West, was, concurrently, right and wrong. He…
Chicken Prediction: O Bother
Gentle reader, our beloved El FC are playing badly right now. Not down bad. Just plain bad. How do we turn this around? This helps not in the least: But, if we’re being honest, just having these two somewhat available is good news. It difficult to try and be even somewhat optimistic. We here at…
Chicken Prediction: I Don’t Care Anymore
Gentle reader, as Thomas Paine tells us, these are the times that try men’s souls. A horrible showing last week. I willed my hens to be optimistic, but should’ve known better. Blues was my theme. I clearly need to heed my own words in the future. To make matters worse, the club issued this ….
Chicken Prediction: St. Louis Blues
Gentle reader, it has been a minute since we last met. I’d like to say that this time has been well spent. I’d be lying if I did, though. We had to contend with crapping out of the Leagues’ Cup. If that didn’t make you blue enough, we then lost a player who meant so…
Chicken Prediction: Daniel-san
Gentle reader, let me begin by thanking fellow compound-mate, Charles, for filling in for me last Wednesday’s match, which was characterized by a sad lacking of our midfield maestro, Daniel Pereira. As one might surmise, our bhoys in viride did not emerge victorious. It really does come down to, no Dani, no party. Sure, some…
Chicken Prediction: A Midwest Ope
Gentle reader, our last match was, in the words of any good Midwesterner, “Ope!” A bit of a surprise, to be honest. Our beloved El FC had been riding higher than prime John Bonham. In fact, I was feeling so good, I found myself humming what is perhaps the greatest cover of any song anywhere,…
Chicken Prediction: Josh the Obscure
Gentle reader, this week has left me in a state of bewilderment. Just two weeks ago, our beloved El FC was playing atrocious footy. No ruthless verticality. All we had was horseshoes of sadness and a lot of crosses. Crosses that went to no one. Crosses that kept coming despite being ineffectual. I did my…
Chicken Prediction: Is This The Real FC?
Gentle reader, I need to thank Charles Peacock, Esq. for his work last week. If you are not aware, he’s a real one. Now, I won’t stoop to that level to explain what he is real at, but he is. This team of ours, our beloved FC, continue to confound those of us here at…
Chicken Prediction: A Sylvan Aries
Gentle reader, you had thoughts about us here at the compound. You felt we were too negative, too nihilistic, too much a harsher of one’s mellow. So, in an effort to prove you wrong, I feigned positivity last match. I went all in on the positivity. To wit: Tell me, reader, how the match turned…