Whoa! What a cardiac-challenged match we witnessed this weekend! Let’s relive that hype one last time: And, yes, my lovely hens augured the win. But, it’s now time we move on towards our destiny. For the second week in a row, our beloved El FC will host the match. This match is against no ordinary…
Author: Louis de Ludovico
Just the Facts
My beloved hens foretold the true score to our last match vs. Colorado. However, the darks arts were afoot as our inestimable respect for PRO refs was challenged as never before. How Lalas got away with that foul is beyond us. But, time moves forward for all. For Colorado players, time is now spent picking…
Prediction: Midnight in the Garden of Good & Q2
Was it the occult or just some random occurrences that led to El FC’s loss last week? Perhaps there’s something in the Pacific Northwest’s water that has made us winless up there. We’re not making any guesses. All we will say is that, once the chickens found out there were no Sambas in their size,…
Chicken Prediction: Gallinaceous FOMO
Thursday morning, my lovely hens woke me up. They were all aflutter. I didn’t know why. Honestly, I wish they hadn’t. You see, I was in the middle of a dream. I was kissing Valentino by a crystal-blue, Italian stream. Regardless, I was now mostly awake and did my best to give my hens the…
Chicken Prediction: Frying Nashville
Holy smokes, were we wrong. The boys in verde had an exemplary second half, leading the team to glory. With hindsight being 20/20, I should’ve known better. You see, gentle reader, that, after consuming their prognosticating snack, a trail that can only be described as a molten brown crayon running amok on the ground made…
Chicken Prediction: Changes
Unfortunately, we were right in predicting a loss. It brings us no joy when these types of prophesies come to fruition. It was not a good night for our boys. Pretty craptastic, if we’re being honest. Like we said, without our most handsome boy providing the juju, we’re not so competitive. We accept our powers,…
Chicken Prediction: Ridiculously Green on Their Side
This is getting ridiculous. Against our better judgement, we optimistically went for a tie. Should’ve not succumbed to the siren song of feeling good about ourselves and life. El FC certainly weren’t feeling it vs. Nashville. In fact, we laid the proverbial egg. It’s moments like that that make me pine for my dear, dead…
Chicken Prediction: Music In Our Ears
What are we supposed to do? We look statistically at matchups, performances, et cetera, et cetera, and we get sad trombone music. We decide to just vibe and we get burned. Excepting Turd, the compound is filled with optimists. He’s a bit of a “Why even have a glass? It’s just gonna get broken or…
Chicken Prediction: Glory! Glory! Austin Verdes!
Wow. We were wrong. Gloriously wrong. I’m ecstatic that we were wrong. In our defense, I’d like to ask anyone to point us to a reputable bookie who got the prediction correct. The only logical conclusion: despite the odds, our boys in verde will not be stopped. Honestly, I was wondering how we were so…
Chicken Prediction: Pain in the A-T-X
Oof. That hurt. I don’t know of anyone who was expecting that kind of pain from the last match. Somehow, the chickens missed it. Perhaps their powers were clouded by the residual love for Adrian and the Aztex. Perhaps it was their new ethically sourced, pelleted feed that threw them off. Regardless, they laid the…