The False 9
Menu
  • Home
  • About Us
  • Twitter
  • Instagram
  • Newsletter Sign Up
Menu

The Definitive Giveaway Rankings – San Diego FC edition

Posted on June 4, 2025June 4, 2025 by Travis McTravelFace

The False Nine travelled to San Diego this weekend and we were rewarded with SDFC beach towels as a consolidation prize for not showing up on the field in their lovely city. These things are hard to take pictures of, but that won’t stop us from reviewing it as that is our God-given quest here…

Read more

One-Third of the Way Home: A 2025 Austin FC Review (So Far)

Posted on May 14, 2025May 14, 2025 by Uncle Tony P.

Uncle Tony P. takes a deep look at Austin FC so far in the 2025 season and explains why the next three games are the biggest of the season.

Read more

The False Nine Travel Blog: Cincinnati

Posted on May 13, 2025 by Charles Peacock

The False Nine decided to make our yearly group away trip to Cincinnati this season. And even though we have no idea when Austin FC will play here next (outside of it being before we play in Colombus) this is a travel guide we put together of things to do and see for your next…

Read more

The Definitive Giveaway Rankings – FC Cincinnati edition

Posted on May 12, 2025May 12, 2025 by Charles Peacock

The False Nine travelled to FC Cincinnati this weekend and we were surprisingly rewarded with a giveaway from TQL Stadium (The Tickle), which means due to the blood pact we made for Austin FC to exist…we have to do a giveaway ranking. In case you are new here: we here at The False Nine, in…

Read more

La Murga Report – Week of 5/3/2025 vs. Minnesota and El Paso

Posted on May 9, 2025May 9, 2025 by H.E. Pennypacker

The match-by-match report on La Murga de Austin’s setlist and an analysis of which songs correspond to goals scored or conceded by Austin FC.

Read more

The False Nine Predicts: Austin FC vs. El Paso Locomotive

Posted on May 7, 2025May 7, 2025 by Charles Peacock

Tonight Austin FC start their US Open Cup campaign, entering at the round of 32 and taking on the El Paso Locomotive. Austin FC has had a brief US Open Cup history (four total matches) and it has one very clear highlight: the only USOC game Austin won. For those of you unaware, this win…

Read more

Power Rankings Week 10

Posted on April 30, 2025April 30, 2025 by Travis McTravelFace

Well, we are huge fans of 4 consecutive kickoffs on Sunday. Heck, we could start with an east coast match at 1 PM ET, and make it 5 MLS matches each Sunday, keeping 10 matches on Saturday. Apple, you have a brilliant idea here that we urge you to take advantage of.

Read more

The False Nine Predicts Austin FC vs. Houston Dynamo or “This is our shortest away day, may as well go”

Posted on April 26, 2025April 26, 2025 by Charles Peacock

Hello readers! Louis is out this week as his presence is needed at the Vatican, he is a smoke scholar and is responsible for making sure the smoke during Papal elections comes out just the right color. I write this already on the road thanks to the wonders of modern technology, I anticipated the drive…

Read more

La Murga Report – 4/19/2025 vs. LA Galaxy

Posted on April 24, 2025April 24, 2025 by H.E. Pennypacker

The match-by-match report on La Murga de Austin’s setlist and an analysis of which songs correspond to goals scored or conceded by Austin FC.

Read more

The Definitive Austin FC Giveaway Index: HEB Re-Usable Grocery Bag (4/19/2025)

Posted on April 23, 2025April 22, 2025 by Charles Peacock

There are very few things in life better than getting something for free. It’s why the human race has engineered ways to fire hot dogs, t-shirts, and tacos out of a compressed air cannon.  We here at The False Nine, in our attempt to cover all aspects of Austin FC fandom, have come up with…

Read more
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • …
  • 42
  • Next

The Latest

  • The Definitive Giveaway Rankings – San Diego FC edition
  • One-Third of the Way Home: A 2025 Austin FC Review (So Far)
  • The False Nine Travel Blog: Cincinnati
  • The Definitive Giveaway Rankings – FC Cincinnati edition
  • La Murga Report – Week of 5/3/2025 vs. Minnesota and El Paso

Archives

  • June 2025
  • May 2025
  • April 2025
  • March 2025
  • February 2025
  • January 2025
  • November 2024
  • October 2024
  • September 2024
  • August 2024
  • July 2024
  • June 2024
  • May 2024
  • April 2024
  • March 2024
  • February 2024
  • January 2024
  • November 2023
  • October 2023
  • September 2023
  • August 2023
  • July 2023
  • June 2023
  • May 2023
  • April 2023
  • March 2023
  • February 2023
  • January 2023
  • December 2022
  • November 2022
  • October 2022
  • September 2022
  • August 2022
  • July 2022
  • June 2022
  • May 2022
  • April 2022
  • March 2022
  • February 2022
©2025 The False 9