It’s match day 6 of the MLS season and everything surrounding Austin FC sucks right now. Luckily, the rest of the league exists for us to enjoy.
The Definitive Austin FC Giveaway Index – Netspend Phone Wallet (3/16/2024)
There are very few things in life better than getting something for free. It’s why the human race has engineered ways to fire hot dogs, t-shirts, and tacos out of a compressed air cannon We here at The False Nine, in our attempt to cover all aspects of Austin FC fandom, have come up with…
La Murga Report – 3/16/24 vs. Philadelphia
The match-by-match report on La Murga de Austin’s setlist and an analysis of which songs correspond to goals scored or conceded by Austin FC.
MLS Cheering Guide: Volume 3, Week 4
Saturday, March 16th Chicago Fire vs CF Montreal – 1:00 p.m. (Apple TV)Montreal are in the middle of a six game road trip to start the season and have picked up 7 points in 3 games. Quickly becoming a team to watch. Chicago…..well they technically field a team. D.C. United vs Inter Miami – 1:00…
A Declaration of Verdependence
As Philadelphia comes to Q2 Stadium, Turd Verdeson & Louis de Ludovico have come together to create The Declaration of Verdependence.
La Murga Report – 3/9/24 vs. St. Louis CITY
The match-by-match report on La Murga de Austin’s setlist and an analysis of which songs correspond to goals scored or conceded by Austin FC.
The Chickens Predict: Austin FC vs. St Louis CITY
Austin FC is back at Q2 and I have to say I am very happy to be back at the Compound with the Chickens. Wolffie and San Julius have been incredibly comforting in this trying time for Austin FC. From giving up more than 11 corners a match, being outshot 45-11, or their complete lack…
MLS Cheering Guide: Volume 3, Week 3
Saturday, March 9th NYCFC vs Portland Timbers – 1:00 p.m. (Apple TV)Can NYCFC can keep pace with Austin and San Jose in the early race for the Wooden Spoon? Toronto FC vs FC Charlotte – 1:00 p.m. (Apple TV)A battle between two teams whom I may have underestimated in the pre-season. The game to watch…
How to make a Bad Situation Worse: The Austin FC II Open Cup Ticketing Mess
After the 2023 season, our expectations for 2024 Austin FC were pretty low. We just finished a miserable season, and Rodo made it pretty clear that the rebuild of the first team was going to take multiple transfer windows. Maybe come close to a play-in game in the West, get smashed in Leagues Cup, somehow…
50 Games of Futility: You’re Losing Us Anthony
I woke up this past Sunday morning and did my usual in-season routine: During this week’s pod in which The False 9’s own Charles Peacock was a panelist, the group spoke briefly about Josh Wolff’s job status and mentioned that Austin FC had only procured 56 points in its last 50 MLS regular season matches….