Listen, you already know about that team in Southern Oklahoma. I don’t need to educate you on them. So today, I have a message for the boys in Verde.
Gentlemen –
I have no problem being blunt with you. Tonight’s match is the most important one in Austin FC’s short history. Yes, we can take home Copa Tejas with a win or draw. Yes, we can guarantee a stay in first place with a victory. But there’s more to this one.
Frankly, we’re tired of Frisco, FUCKING FRISCO, being to able lord over us that Austin has yet to beat them. A town known for Jerry Jones searching out glory holes and being the home to insurrectionists should not have any bragging rights over our beautiful city in any way. I would say they deserve to be shamed, but it’s impossible to shame the shameless. They should get nothing. No Copa Tejas. No bragging rights. Not even a damn playoff spot, which you can knock them out of with a victory.
Tonight is a chance to raise our first trophy of the season. We WANT it. Send Copa Tejas back on the bus to Austin with us, because it’s wasting away in that hellscape up north.
We’re coming nearly 1,000 strong tonight in support of you. Los Verdes will be there. Austin Anthem will be there. La Murga will be there. We have your back. We will be loud. We will not back down for 90 minutes.
Whip their asses up and down the pitch. Let’s show these fuckers who runs this state.
With Pride,
ATX
Uncle Tony P.
Uncle Tony P. is a lifelong Austin FC supporter and overall handsome son of a bitch who always has a full supply of mustard on hand for his Verde friends.