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Month: August 2022

Chicken Prediction: Glory! Glory! Austin Verdes!

Posted on August 30, 2022 by Louis de Ludovico

Wow. We were wrong. Gloriously wrong. I’m ecstatic that we were wrong. In our defense, I’d like to ask anyone to point us to a reputable bookie who got the prediction correct. The only logical conclusion: despite the odds, our boys in verde will not be stopped. Honestly, I was wondering how we were so…

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MLS Cheering Guide – Match Day 28

Posted on August 29, 2022August 29, 2022 by Uncle Tony P.

You know what I think I enjoyed almost as much as beating the shit out of LAFC last Friday night?  Having the entire rest of the weekend to kick back and watch everyone else duke it out while I basically did this: Good times.  But we must move on quickly as there is a full…

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Magic Number Update 5 (8/29)

Posted on August 29, 2022October 25, 2022 by Travis McTravelFace

Since, some of you have started following this series after the first post, there were multiple requests to explain what a magic number is, so I’ll kick into that before gushing about our 4-1 thrashing of LAFC. The magic number is the number of points we need to gain to be one point higher than…

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La Murga Report – 8/26/2022 vs. LAFC

Posted on August 27, 2022August 27, 2022 by Charles Peacock

If you are unfamiliar with the concept of The False 9’s La Murga Report, click here. I approached yesterday’s match with apprehension, not just at the worry of trying to keep my iPhone dry while sitting with the Verde Wall, but also the match itself. Burdened by knowing what the (Incredibly Incorrect) Chickens predicted I was…

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Chicken Prediction: Pain in the A-T-X

Posted on August 25, 2022August 25, 2022 by Louis de Ludovico

Oof. That hurt. I don’t know of anyone who was expecting that kind of pain from the last match. Somehow, the chickens missed it. Perhaps their powers were clouded by the residual love for Adrian and the Aztex. Perhaps it was their new ethically sourced, pelleted feed that threw them off. Regardless, they laid the…

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MLS Cheering Guide – Week 27

Posted on August 24, 2022August 24, 2022 by Uncle Tony P.

MLS teams have between 6-9 (nice!) games left to play in the 2022 regular season, meaning it’s officially crunch time for everyone trying to make the playoffs.  In the East, 5th through 9th place is separated by just 2 points, while the West logjam sees 6th through 10th place with only a 3-point difference.  With…

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Magic Number Update 4

Posted on August 22, 2022August 21, 2022 by Travis McTravelFace

Well, Austin FC picked up its first road loss in nearly three months on Saturday night in Minnesota. If you had told us at the beginning of the season that a road run to Montreal, Charlotte, Colorado, Atlanta, Frisco, and Kansas City would have led to 16 points in 18, we would have all thought…

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House and Home

Posted on August 19, 2022 by Louis de Ludovico

I’m not going to lie to you, my dear and gentle readers. My hens were off in their prediction. They saw the win but they didn’t foresee the assault on our collective blood pressure. I began to despair. My pride in the powers of my hens and my ability to read them had taken a…

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MLS Cheering Guide – Week 26

Posted on August 18, 2022August 18, 2022 by Uncle Tony P.

We are less than two months from the playoffs starting, which is weird to think about because this season has flown by.  Luckily for us, this is MLS and the unique setup of the league typically offers up an insane stretch run where a bunch of teams are in a Ron Burgundy news team fight. …

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Magic Number Update 3

Posted on August 18, 2022 by Travis McTravelFace

Well DC United tried their hardest to stay competitive with LAFC on Tuesday night, it simply wasn’t enough for Wayne Rooney’s men, especially once they were down to 10 men. At this point, LAFC is 9 points above us, and they only need 19 more points to eliminate us and clinch home field advantage. Even…

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The Latest

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  • Power Rankings Week 10
  • The False Nine Predicts Austin FC vs. Houston Dynamo or “This is our shortest away day, may as well go”
  • La Murga Report – 4/19/2025 vs. LA Galaxy

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