Well, that was a match last week against the Red Bulls. Sadly, chickens can’t predict COVID cases, because they would have predicted a different result without Brad Stuver. Thankfully, we have seen Stuver in training this week, so we don’t need to make dual predictions.
After our triumph in Frisco, I was supposed to take a few weeks off to go to Europe to take advantage of the 1:1 Dollar:Euro rate and watch some qualifying for the Europa Conference League and the lesser Champions League. I had tickets lined up in Malta to see Hibernians play Levadia from Estonia and then I was heading to Thessaloniki to see Aris and their incredible fans play Gomel from Belarus and finally to Athens to see qualification for the ancient and lesser Champions League between Greek champions Olympiacos and Israeli champions Maccabi Haifa. If only McKalla/MLS allowed flares and streamers in the stadium like they do in Greece…
Sadly, I finally got COVID on the Wheelie Nelson bus coming back from Frisco, so I wasn’t able to go to Europe. But luckily our friends at British Airways (a valued OneWorld partner) and Malta Air (well their parent company RyanAir charged us a fee to switch names, because what’s a trip to Europe without a RyanAir fee), let me switch Louis onto the ticket so he could watch the football and visit statues and other legacies of the Greek and Roman empires across Malta and Greece. As a result, I was left with our chickens. Luckily, we had enough rapid COVID tests (thanking the US government for ending the testing requirements to come back to the US for our surplus along with their free mail tests) at the compound to confirm that Wolfie and San Julius have remained COVID-free over the past two weeks.
I started to explain that our boys in Verde from El FC were heading to Kansas City, and our hens became terrified. While I know they eat a lot of chicken wings in the Midwest with copious amounts of sweet BBQ sauce, I was confused by their reactions. Then, I remembered that the University of Kansas mascot is the Jayhawks, and their arch rival, Kansas State, used to throw live chickens on the basketball court before games against the Jayhawks. The news of these awful crimes against chickens reverberated across the poultry world.
Luckily, El FC doesn’t play in the Big 12/10/14/22, and they can remain in the eastern most fringes of this so called “free” state. Once I reassured Wolfie and San Julius that their biggest threats were drunk NASCAR drivers crashing into the Nebraska Furniture Mart near the stadium, they calmed down.
While I am surely not as good of a chicken reader as Louis is, I tried my best to sense the hens mood. San Julius made three dashes to the left, and Wolfie made one exhausted step to the right (almost like he had run for 120 minutes a few days ago in a hot environment), so hence:
El FC 3; Sporting I’d rather be in Lisbon than Kansas City, Kansas 1