I woke up this past Sunday morning and did my usual in-season routine: During this week’s pod in which The False 9’s own Charles Peacock was a panelist, the group spoke briefly about Josh Wolff’s job status and mentioned that Austin FC had only procured 56 points in its last 50 MLS regular season matches….
The Chickens Predict: Austin FC at Seattle Sounders
It’s been a sad week at The Compound, not just because of how quickly Austin dashed our hopes in the first match of the season, but because the weather swings have been absolute hell on everyone. We’ve had between 4/6 and 12/16 of the staff down with the flu, congestion, or bad coughs the entire…
MLS Cheering Guide: Volume 3, Week 2
Saturday, March 2nd Real Salt Lake vs LAFC – 1:00 p.m. CT (Apple TV)I can give you soccer reasons to watch this game. But why do that when it is very likely going to be complete chaos thanks to the weather?! 65 MPH wind gusts!!!! Calling it right now: a keeper is going to try…
TF9 Wrestling Fantasy Books Verdisimo
August 6th, 2022. Verdisimo, our resident Austin FC Luchador, was brought into existence. Like a true wrestling hero, he arrived with fanfare and was immediately pushed, as we say in the business, with 7 points in four games including an incredible comeback against Sporting KC where the team twice kicked out of the opposition’s best…
The Definitive Austin FC Giveaway Index – LED Bracelet Giveaway (2/24/2024)
There are very few things in life better than getting something for free. It’s why the human race has engineered ways to fire hot dogs, t-shirts, and tacos out of a compressed air cannon. We here at The False Nine, in our attempt to cover all aspects of Austin FC fandom, have come up with…
La Murga Report – 2/24/24 vs. Minnesota
The match-by-match report on La Murga de Austin’s setlist and an analysis of which songs correspond to goals scored or conceded by Austin FC.
The Chickens are back! Prediction for Austin FC vs. Minnesota United
The Austin FC season officially starts tonight at Q2 against Minnesota United. Yes, we’ve been on a bit of an hiatus (our tweets per day and articles per month metrics as bad as Don Garber’s approval ratings), but there was a valid reason for that in fact, possibly the most important reason for our site…
MLS Cheering Guide: Volume 3, Week 1
Hello you MLS Sickos! Somehow Austin FC avoided relegation last year so we’re back for year number four in this zany ass league. Speaking of, I should probably get you caught up on a few things: Usually in this space we do a “cheering guide”, where I try to make informed decisions on who we…
The 2024 Season Preview Roundtable
The False 9 Staff is here to preview the 2024 MLS season for Austin FC. Can they make the playoffs? And what is Rodo cooking?
Just Howlin’ Around – Back to the Office
EXT: view of a suburban house. INT: We see the kitchen and dining room table separated by a countertop. A staircase to the second story of the house is in the background. ANGELA is in the kitchen preparing breakfast. GAVIN is seated at the table looking at his phone eating breakfast. JOSH comes down the…