It’s matchday in Austin and today the Verde & Black welcome a first time visitor to Q2 Stadium. Austin FC is looking to complete an undefeated year against the Eastern division, so let’s get to know the team standing in their way: The New York Red Bulls.
NYRB Fast Facts
- MLS Debut: 1996
- Nickname: Obvious
- Current Record: 9-6-6 (33 points)
- Finish Last Season: 7th East (48 points, Lost 1st Round)
- Trophies: 3 (3x Supporters’ Shield Winners – 2013, 2015, 2018)
- Wooden Spoons: 2 (1999, 2009)
- Names You May Know: Lewis Morgan, Caden Clark
- Famous Harrison Folks: Tab Ramos, MTV VJ Matt Pinfield, Beverly Kenney
Why does NY play home matches in Harrison, NJ?
Because that’s what NY does. Both NFL teams play in the Garden State already, so why not these guys? In fact, the team has only played four home matches EVER in the state of New York. All of which were U.S. Open Cup affairs. And you know what? I’d still take playing at Red Bull Arena in Harrison Fucking New Jersey over playing at Yankee Stadium.
- By the way, has any state nickname ever been so false as the Garden State? I’ve been to Jersey. It’s…..not great.
Why did Red Bull screw up a perfectly great MLS 1.0 nickname?
The overly long named New York/New Jersey MetroStars was a perfect encapsulation of 1996 MLS. Of course, after two years, the team just went by MetroStars, which is an undeniably awesome upgrade. Kind of like the name Young Boys in Europe, some things need to be left alone. But we can’t have nice things and a terrible energy drink company hell bent on buying clubs around the world to screwed it up for everyone.
What is New Jersey’s greatest export?
The Sopranos. And like the state the show hails from, it’s highly overrated. Seriously, go back and watch the show again. Need something to happen? Bank on a key character getting into a car crash and going to the hospital. Like watching the Red Bulls chase an elusive MLS Cup every year, the show was repetitive and rarely went anywhere worthwhile, eventually just cutting to black to end the misery.
Final Match Day Hate Rating
I don’t hate the Red Bulls. They consistently produce fun young talent and that’s good for the league. However, I hate Red Bull. It tastes like shit and nearly gave me a heart attack once when I didn’t know it was in an alcoholic beverage. And it infuriates me when people want to drink Jager-bombs instead of straight Jager like an adult. Screw ’em.
Uncle Tony P.
Uncle Tony P. is a lifelong Austin FC supporter and overall handsome son of a bitch who always has a full supply of mustard on hand for his Verde friends.