It’s been a rough few days. The chickens have been misbehaving. Had I known how difficult it would be I would have said no (or killed them for smoking purposes right after Louis left).
Friday morning I got out of bed and immediately heard a crunch sound, an egg had been laid next to my bed, and now my day has begun with my foot covered in egg yolk and pieces of shells in the carpet.
After washing off my foot, cleaning the carpet, and getting dressed, I made my way to the coop to check for some fresh eggs, thinking a homemade scramble would help change the direction of my day. When I did Rodney stood in the middle of the coop, surrounded by shells but with two eggs left. Then Rodney looked up at me, clucked and proceeded to crack open both eggs in an aggressive stomp movement that would have been a red card in any league in the world.
Thinking their misbehavior may have been caused by their separation I let them all into the same pen to socialize. They proceeded to try and “Tabletop” me as two would circle around to get behind my legs while the other would try and fly/jump at me from the front. While they weren’t able to successfully get me to fall over, their coordination and tactics forced me to once again separate them.
Now that his conference ended and the phone blackout is over, Louis sent an email to check in on his flock:
How are the chickens? I just saw your prediction, I should have warned you the nod wasn’t the chicken agreeing to the prediction, it was the chickens agreeing to give you an intentionally wrong prediction. They like to do this when I let someone else watch them.
Other things to watch out for:
-Laying eggs near your bed so you step on them;
-Denying fresh eggs being gathered;
-Trying to “Tabletop” you;
Buoyed by the new intel, I went back out to look at the chickens, staring them in their beady little eyes. Rodney again clucked twice, and the chicken next to her nodded.
“I know the nod isn’t your actual prediction, it’s just you toying around with the substitute just like all the other pranks you’ve pulled this week!” I yelled loud enough to disturb those with office windows on the coopside of the building.
Then the chickens looked at me in the way that only a sentient and knowledgeable creature can look at another. It was at this moment I realized, this week was a test, they were trying to see if I was worthy of their foreknowledge of the world. These chickens weren’t just egg laying machines that fulfilled their life’s purpose by ending up dead and on our table. This is why Louis has such a bond with them, why he cares for them, why he believes in them. It was in this moment of revival that I looked down:
Rodney clucked, and laid an egg: it was Verde
San Julius clucked and also laid an egg: It was Purple
Then Wolffie looked at the other two, then at me, clucked, and with great anticipation on my part, I saw the egg come out and hit the ground.
It was Verde.
El FC 2, Orlando SC 1