Austin FC is back at Q2 and I have to say I am very happy to be back at the Compound with the Chickens. Wolffie and San Julius have been incredibly comforting in this trying time for Austin FC. From giving up more than 11 corners a match, being outshot 45-11, or their complete lack of offensive output during meaningful periods of either match, it’s been a really rough start to the season for us Verde faithful. With Sebastian Driussi still listed as questionable and Leo Vaisanen out Austin comes in undermanned against a team they have never beaten.
There is something even uglier than how Austin FC have played this season, and its how St Louisians cut bagels:
Bagels are a near perfect food that can be eaten at any time of the day. They’re a beautiful wheel of carbs that come in sweet and savory varieties with myriad options of what can be part of the dough or the flavors that can be put on top of them. For this reason they are great for small groups and make for a great office snack. We get a dozen delivered to the Compound every morning, air dropped in from Brooklyn, to make sure they are fresh. To make sure the flares can be seen we use the same boxes as Q2 that catch fire every match,
But why, why in all of Gods’ great earth would you slice the bagel so incorrectly? Why would you take away it’s distinctive shape and make it more difficult to prepare?
I pondered this as I had one of those fresh bagels, thinking how those from Hoosierville would debase them in this way. It’s bad enough they douse their BBQ in sauce, taking away the entire point of trying to taste the meat and the heat. Really the only redeemable food from this area is their toasted ravioli, which lets face it, isn’t that complicated to figure out, and despite how some refer to St Louis as “The Rome of the West” the best ravioli is still found in Italy.
Austin FC 1 – Incorrect Bagel Cutting CITY 3