Tik Martins, the lovable sidekick and unofficial mascot to the boys of Austin FC has become a bear of great intrigue as of late. The outfits, traveling in style, his very own Instagram account. But as I’m sure you can tell by the title, this is not going to be your average fluff piece.
When inquiring with previous employers to learn more about Tik, a reliable source came forward. Asking to be identified only as “former management”, I was given full access to the often dark and winding road that preceded Tik’s arrival in Austin.
Unlike most, Tik struck gold when he set out to make it in Hollywood. After one audition, he scored the lead body double role for the star of Ted 2.
“Some might say it was because of the lack of working bears in Hollywood these days, but anyone who knows Tik knows it was talent and hard work that got him there.” His former management said.
However, after the movie failed to acquire the funding needed for a third installment, Tik started to look elsewhere for work. He scored a couple quick paydays with Hallmark channel, hosted a few nightclub gigs and tried his hand at DJing.
“At that point we still had so much faith in him,” former management said. “We got him on the bachelorette, but things took a turn when he drank too much and defecated in the hot tub.”
Producers had him removed from the show before the second rose ceremony and it was at that point friends began to worry about him. Tik started to rack up legal woes, starting first when he totaled a golf cart at his country club and refused to pay, saying it was their fault for renting a cart out to a teddy bear.
“He got in a fight with Elmo on Hollywood Boulevard at 9am. The next week I get a call saying he drank enough chocolate milk to cause a glucose spike so intense he was kicked out of a gentleman’s club. He had to be removed from the parking lot at 4 in the morning. We made a recommendation he go take a vacation or at least apologize publicly, but that didn’t happen.”
Tik deleted all social media, fired his publicist and went into hiding for a brief period. His poor spending habits even led him to fall for a multilevel marketing scheme. He got stuck with about $450,000 in non-returnable Lularoe leggings.
Finding himself short on cash, he did what most California residents do: moved to Austin. He sold his 1 bed/1 bath home for $2.1 million and headed for Texas. Tik’s former management says they lost track of him for a few months, until one day the phone rang.
“He sounded a lot better. Said he cleaned up his act. Even took up doing acro yoga in the park.”
Tik’s new found hobby would finally bring him the peace he needed to let go of his old life. Cleaned up and ready to start a new adventure, Tik wandered into the local mall’s Build-A-Bear Workshop, hopped into a bin and awaited his new life.
These days Tik’s life is showing so much promise. He’s back on Instagram, has a healthy support system, and appears to be getting along well with his newly found brothers. As for the future, we’ll just have to sit back and watch. Something tells me Tik has just bearly scratched the surface on all the good things to come.
Special thanks to Kerry T. for the photo edits.
