Hello readers, I am filling in for this mid week match Chicken Prediction/Preview. Louis is still recovering from his “Watch Party” on Sunday night where something shocking happened…
The Chickens turned on him.
It was all a misunderstanding. After the time ran out on Austin FC’s
season match against the Portland Timbers. Louis started talking about the next opponent, the New York Red Bulls.
For those of you blissfully unaware there is a near ubiquitous ad campaign centered around how this drink, Red Bull, “Gives you Wings”
Unfortunately, the topic of “wings” is cursed here at The Compound. The chickens understandably take umbrage with the near perfect food that is made from their metaphorical brothers and sisters. Fried chicken wings originated in the southern US as they were considered undesirable parts of the bird but were popularized when (I swear to Rodney Redes this is true) Dick Winger used the invention of Buffalo Wings as a way to sell his hot sauce. Now there is a verifiable chicken genocide as per the National Chicken Council 1.45 BILLION chicken wings were consumed just during a random weekend in February.
Louis is safe (the bullets merely grazed his femoral artery) and we were able to get the chickens corralled before they got a chance to peck him apart. Needless to say, we will be very careful in any jokes or references we make during the match tonight.
The Chicken Prediction:
Austin FC 2 – New York Gives You Wings – 2